Results

I am lax in putting this up. It's not because I've been pondering what to say about it. Like everything that's been going on in the past year with @RelUnrelated's cancer diagnosis and the general shit that's come along with it to make life even more miserable results of the CT scan that he had to have two-thirds of the way through his chemo are to see how effective the treatment has been. Considering he's gained all the weight back that he lost and a little more, his color is no longer jaundiced, and he's not running very high fevers and vomitting constantly, I'd say that chances are the treatment was going quite well.

We waited for awhile because we were early, he had to have chemo that day and the doctor herself came out to call him back for the pre-chemo check over and to tell him the results. She apologized that the nurse hadn't come out sooner, they were running a bit behind. She sat us down in the office and started out with, "You got an A on your test!" So yeah, as now, he has only two more sessions of chemotherapy left. No radiation. That doesn't mean that all this is over. No. There will be years of scans and check ups and follow ups to make sure that the rapidly shrinking lymphoma is staying that way. And that's fine. At least we'll know what the hell is going on. It looks like everything is going to be better. 


I haven't talked much about it since May. There really hasn't been that much to say. He's had appointments and treatments and medicines and has been getting better and better. Looking at him, you wouldn't know he's going through chemotherapy. His hair is coming back. It has been for the last month and it looks like he has a buzz cut. After finding out what was going on and learning about the process that one has to go through to try and stop the disease, it was like a weight off my shoulders. He has a very curable form of cancer and we were lucky for that. I didn't pray or ask anyone to. I didn't need to. I knew what we were doing was the only thing that would have any impact on his illness. No magical sky fairy could make any difference. If I wanted fantasy, I would pick up a book or watch a movie. We did what helped. We went to doctors and got proven treatment for an illness that no amount of whispering to yourself can fix. The medications have worked and for that I am glad. I am glad to have had such a kick ass team of doctors and nurses at the cancer center that would probably bend over backwards to help the patients that they treat and their families. Those people and the science behind the medications are what has done the job on they lymphoma. That's the only thing that will. 

I won't say that people didn't say they were praying. I didn't make fun of them, because the majority of them were family members. Most were not close family members. I think only distant cousins ever said they would pray for us. My immediate family didn't. My parents who were a great help didn't. My brother who is living in another state now didn't. They just came and helped with whatever they could. My oldest stepdaughter did say she was going to pray and put her dad's name down on some prayer lists and that she knew we would laugh about it. She was just worried about her dad and that's fine. She knows that her dad and I are not religious at all. She's also not crazy fundie about it either, nor would she ever try to force those views on us. She's a good kid that was worried and I cannot fault her for that. She loves her dad and doesn't want anything to happen to him. I don't want anything to happen to him either, otherwise I wouldn't have stayed with him for the last 15 years. 

So the good news is that it looks like the lymphoma is going bye-bye. We can't say that for certain until it's been 5 years. And having gone through chemotherapy also makes his chances of getting another cancer a little higher as he gets older. I'm not going to spend my life worrying about that though. No one is immune to disease. I'm going to enjoy the time we have because that's all we have. There's no grand afterlife or heaven or hell or rebirth. You live and then you die. It's the part that's between those two that are the most important. Enjoy them while you can.